Getting a Kelly Carwash

Where EG's starting to wish she had moved to warmer climes when she had the chance..

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

Winter

I got a (very short) comment on my blog (that said my post on the mullet wedding was funny) from one of my favorite bloggers and it inspired me to keep writing. Now I realize the only one who’s probably stuck with me this long is Lisa, but to hell with it. It’s my blog after all. Besides, now I can rip on everyone and not worry about them getting mad at me.

Another reason I wanted to post again was this entry by sweetney (dated Jan 10, 2006). I only read her occasionally as she’s normally too melancholy for me (though I luuuuurve her taste in music). But she also sometimes writes the things I’d love to write in the way I’d love to write them. Anyway, the above post could, in many ways, have been written by me (except the whole goth thing… I’m not that into black…). Except that I have to be more cheerful than her or risk disappearing into my dark thoughts. I can’t resign myself to the fact that the world is as irreparably damaged as she makes it out to be and as I sometimes fear it is. I crave hope. I can’t live without it. When I read her words, all I see is black. It makes me want to crawl in a hole and never come out. It makes me wonder if it’s all worth it. And I just can’t live that way. Besides, I wonder if I am (and she is) just being over dramatic. Yes, this world is really screwed up, but it’s also beautiful. How can I be so egotistical as to believe my time is so worse than my parent’s time, or my grandparent’s time? So while I feel for her, and understand her despair, I refuse to loose myself in it. Maybe that means I’m not as creative, or as socially conscious. Or maybe it means I’ve knowingly pulled the wool over my own eyes. But seriously? We’ve only got one shot at this life. And it’s possible for me to make the world a better place without completely loosing my identity within its problems. Doesn’t pessimism do more harm than good? Isn’t optimism what we really truly need?

So I could spend paragraphs and paragraphs on what’s happened over the last few months, but I won’t… It’s been a good few months. Full of family and holidays and good cheer. And the weather? Wonderful. Amazing. Seriously fantastic. I can’t remember a winter with weather I’ve enjoyed more. And that alone could be the reason why I’ve been so content.

2 Comments:

At 5:42 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's good to have you back!

 
At 7:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

it's about time ...

 

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