Getting a Kelly Carwash

I'm a stupid, stupid girl

2006-11-01T20:21:00.000-08:00

So... One of my favorite bloggers is hosting a contest of sorts. Entry into the contest requires posting a blog entry every day for the next 30 days. Yikes. I have no idea if I have that much to say. Luckily, pictures count and God knows I could post a picture of my dogs every day for the next 10 years and still have some left.

Here's something that made me laugh today. (Yes, I know that was totally random.)

We're still moving into our new house, but I can tell the excitement the change is starting to wear off. About the only thing I accomplished this evening was buying groceries. And since I ordered them online last night all that involved was driving into the drive through lane, popping my trunk, and lifting the heavy stuff into my car (much to the embarrassment of the (extremely slow moving) little boy that was supposed to be loading them for me).

But, on a positive note, we've now joined the millions of people with digital cable and I can finally converse intelligently about Mythbusters at work lunches with the boys.

My exceedingly boring life is even putting ME to sleep, so I think its probably almost time to go to bed. And now I only have 29 more days left to write. By then end of this you'll be begging for more dog pictures.

2006-11-01T17:20:00.000-08:00

See? Isn't this better than reading more of my rambling?

2006-07-25T17:25:00.001-07:00

The beach on Hilton Head Island

2006-07-25T17:25:00.000-07:00

Atlantic Ocean - Hilton Head Island

2006-07-25T17:12:00.000-07:00

Atlantic Ocean off of Hilton Head Island.

2006-07-25T17:00:00.000-07:00

The Salty Dog Cafe - Hilton Head Island.

2006-07-25T15:26:00.001-07:00

America's Cup sailboat on Hilton Head Island

2006-07-25T15:26:00.000-07:00

Our hotel room on Hilton Head Island.

2006-07-25T15:24:00.001-07:00

Bonaventure Cemetary - Savannah.

2006-07-25T15:24:00.000-07:00

Bonaventure Cemetary - Savannah.

2006-07-25T15:23:00.000-07:00

Bonaventure Cemetary - Savannah.

2006-07-25T15:22:00.000-07:00

Bonaventure Cemetary - Savannah

2006-07-25T15:12:00.000-07:00

Bonaventure Cemetary - Savannah

2006-07-25T15:11:00.000-07:00

Bonaventure Cemetary - Savannah.

2006-07-25T15:10:00.000-07:00

Victory Road in Savannah.

2006-07-25T15:09:00.000-07:00

Paul Dean's restaurant, and the line to get in. Needless to say, we didn't go.

2006-07-20T21:11:00.001-07:00

Swimming!

2006-07-20T21:11:00.000-07:00

Mister big mouth

2006-07-20T21:10:00.000-07:00

Sailing class.

2006-07-20T21:09:00.000-07:00

Peice of sun.

2006-07-12T15:42:00.000-07:00

But kibble is better!

2006-07-12T15:41:00.001-07:00

Mmm... Green beans are good...

2006-07-12T15:41:00.000-07:00

Yummy!

2006-07-12T15:40:00.001-07:00

Green beans! From my garden!

2006-07-12T15:40:00.000-07:00

When hoses attack!

2006-07-12T15:39:00.001-07:00

Shoe repairs

2006-07-12T15:39:00.000-07:00

Ah... Cute!

2006-07-12T15:37:00.000-07:00

It's too hot out!

2006-07-12T15:36:00.000-07:00

Stay at home day

And Now a Break From Our Regularly Scheduled Programming

2006-07-10T06:59:00.000-07:00

If anyone still checks this (which I highly doubt), I just wanted to give you the heads up that I'm going to be using this space to post pictures and goings-on for Andy while he's down in South Carolina for the next 3 weeks. So no whining if I get all lovey-dovey and mushy and gross.

Also? It's 9:00 on a Monday and I'm still sitting at home in my pajamas. And I plan on staying this way at least until noon. Not sure why I felt the need to document that, but, well, there you go.

2006-07-10T06:56:00.000-07:00

Good morning, He-Pa!

2006-07-10T06:55:00.000-07:00

We hope work is going well!

2006-07-10T06:54:00.000-07:00

Proof that I did actually mow the lawn.

2006-07-10T06:53:00.001-07:00

See if you can find my bone-headed move.

2006-07-10T06:53:00.000-07:00

See it yet?

In Loving Memory

2006-01-13T14:33:00.000-08:00

This blog's namesake, Ch. Kelly's Bold Christy, or Grandma Kelly as we called her, died this morning. She was 17 1/2 years old. I can only hope my boys live to be that long and are that healthy throughout their lives.

Kelly was famous for going between people's legs and stopping mid-way through to let them scratch her back. Kelly's owner, Sally, began calling them carwashes.

Goodbye, old girl.

Chomp Chomp

2006-01-13T13:53:00.000-08:00

I have 2 irrational fears. You could probably even call them phobias. One is of aliens. Not the illegal kind, but the grey skin, almond eyes, no nose, triangle shaped head kind. I’d look up a picture and link to it, but I’d probably have a panic attack. The second fear? Cavities. Yes, I’m desperately afraid of having a cavity. Like can’t-sleep-at-night afraid. I’ve never actually had a cavity, which probably adds to my fear. And I put a little blame on the dentist I had growing up. "Dr. Skeletor" was over 6 feet tall, as bald as a pool ball, wore wire rim glasses, and had about 3% body fat. Picture a skeleton with skin over it, and you know exactly what Dr. Skeletor looked like. And he smelled, well, sterile. Like no dirt had ever touched him or his office. I would have happily eaten off the floor, knowing it was probably cleaner than any plate I’d ever licked. By all accounts he was a strange, but nice, guy. Just think of it, though. You’re 7 years old, and you have to go sit in a claustrophobic room, on a chair that looks like it was used for torture only a few minutes ago, surrounded by strange, loud, sharp tools, and let a skeleton stick his bony hands in your mouth. You’d still be scared of dentists, too.

Oh, yeah, to my point… After 7 years of being too afraid to even think about stepping foot in a dentist’s office, I went today. It was, if you can believe this, one of my New Years resolutions. One that I figured I wouldn’t actually cross off my list, except for the fact that I was getting a little ache in my front tooth and the words, “If you don’t go in soon you’ll have to have a root canal,” kept running through my head (Thanks, Alf). I got a recommendation from my friend, Kelli, who promised I’d love the dentist she sent me to. And you know what? I did! And I loved the hygienist, too! If I were into that sort of thing, I would have totally asked the hygienist out. She was that cool. Anyway, they oooohhhed and aaahhhed over how fantastic my teeth look for not having had them cleaned in so long, and they declared that I don’t have any cavities and probably never will. I did a little happy dance but then felt enormously stupid for making such a big deal out of everything. Oh, and the ache in my front teeth? Just normal teeth sensitivity. God, I’m a dork. Though I still quake at the thought of having a cavity filled. So, I guess I didn’t get rid of one of my irrational fears after all. I guess I'll have to wait until the earth is invaded by aliens...

In other teeth related news, El Presidente got his braces off yesterday. His teeth are beautiful and straight, and he’s totally digging his Invisiline retainer. At the end of his appointment, the hygienists (is that what you call them at an orthodontist office?) all signed a card for him, and gave him 2 movie passes. I’m hoping they do that for all of their clients, but the way he talks about how flirty they are I’m wondering if they didn’t give him a little special treatment. And after reading this post over, I realize that if Andy and I ever feel the need to add a little spice to our love life we’ll have to find ourselves a hygienist (sorry you had to read that, Mom).

Happy Full-Moon Friday the 13th.

Winter

2006-01-10T18:32:00.000-08:00

I got a (very short) comment on my blog (that said my post on the mullet wedding was funny) from one of my favorite bloggers and it inspired me to keep writing. Now I realize the only one who’s probably stuck with me this long is Lisa, but to hell with it. It’s my blog after all. Besides, now I can rip on everyone and not worry about them getting mad at me.

Another reason I wanted to post again was this entry by sweetney (dated Jan 10, 2006). I only read her occasionally as she’s normally too melancholy for me (though I luuuuurve her taste in music). But she also sometimes writes the things I’d love to write in the way I’d love to write them. Anyway, the above post could, in many ways, have been written by me (except the whole goth thing… I’m not that into black…). Except that I have to be more cheerful than her or risk disappearing into my dark thoughts. I can’t resign myself to the fact that the world is as irreparably damaged as she makes it out to be and as I sometimes fear it is. I crave hope. I can’t live without it. When I read her words, all I see is black. It makes me want to crawl in a hole and never come out. It makes me wonder if it’s all worth it. And I just can’t live that way. Besides, I wonder if I am (and she is) just being over dramatic. Yes, this world is really screwed up, but it’s also beautiful. How can I be so egotistical as to believe my time is so worse than my parent’s time, or my grandparent’s time? So while I feel for her, and understand her despair, I refuse to loose myself in it. Maybe that means I’m not as creative, or as socially conscious. Or maybe it means I’ve knowingly pulled the wool over my own eyes. But seriously? We’ve only got one shot at this life. And it’s possible for me to make the world a better place without completely loosing my identity within its problems. Doesn’t pessimism do more harm than good? Isn’t optimism what we really truly need?

So I could spend paragraphs and paragraphs on what’s happened over the last few months, but I won’t… It’s been a good few months. Full of family and holidays and good cheer. And the weather? Wonderful. Amazing. Seriously fantastic. I can’t remember a winter with weather I’ve enjoyed more. And that alone could be the reason why I’ve been so content.

What Goes Up Must Come Down

2005-10-10T08:33:00.000-07:00

What a weekend! Our old fence came down and the new one went up almost without a hitch, and I give all the credit to El Presidente. I was so proud of him that instead of actually helping, I took a million pictures and posted them all on this site (I know, I’m such a good wife…).

Friday after work, we gave the old fence a good push and down it came. The wood poles were so rotten that they just shattered with any amount of pressure. Then we sawed it up into manageable pieces and piled it all up on our driveway to be hauled out at a later time (though knowing us, Andy will have to snow-blow around the pile all winter because we never got around to taking it to the dump). Saturday morning we got up early (by we, I mean Andy and the dogs) to get a good start. But one look at the 3 feet of frost on the ground stopped us in our tracks. When there was STILL some frost at 10, we decided to bite the bullet and get out there anyway (by this time I was actually out of bed). The goal for the day was to get all of the old concrete out of the ground, then concrete in the new terminal posts. We had a wedding to go to at 3:00, so the clock was ticking. Luckily, only one or two of the old posts proved to be tough to extract, and we were done for the day with time to spare.

Then we went to the wedding… And I have to censor myself here because this post is going in a public place, so I’ll just say a couple of things. First, and most importantly, I have rarely met such a nice group of (Mullets!!) people. They all had (Southern accents in Minnesota!!) such friendly smiles on their faces and (Wore jeans to church!) would give you the (Western!) shirts off their backs. We met up with some people Andy knows whom we got along with smashingly, so the evening was much more fun than I had anticipated since, as I had rightly guessed, I didn’t know a single soul there other than my husband.

But the mullets… Did I mention the mullets? And I can write about them because the people who wore them, especially the groom, should be quite proud. They were, all around, some of the best mullets I’d ever seen. I was in utter awe. The mullitude was off the scale.

Sunday Andy finished putting up the fence while I wrote my accounting paper, which is due today. (Nothing like waiting until the last minute, huh? At least I’m not writing it this morning.) I helped a little bit with the unruly chain-link, but Andy did the rest alone. And it looks outstanding, if I do say so myself.

I’m home from work this morning… Andy has to go out of town for work (AGAIN!) today and since I have class and can’t lock the boys up all day and night I need to be here so they can run around a bit. I’m definitely enjoying my nice, quiet morning, though. It’s about the only quiet time I’ll have this week. It’s going to be a crazy one…

2005-10-10T05:49:00.000-07:00

A little push was all we needed to get the old fence down.

2005-10-10T05:48:00.000-07:00

It was cold!

2005-10-10T05:46:00.000-07:00

The old fence (and Ruger's old swimming pool).

2005-10-10T05:44:00.000-07:00

1/2 of the concrete from the old fence

2005-10-10T05:43:00.000-07:00

No, I didn't do any work. I just took pictures.

2005-10-10T05:42:00.000-07:00

Is it straight yet?

2005-10-10T05:40:00.000-07:00

The finished product

2005-10-10T05:39:00.000-07:00

The man with the plan

2005-10-10T05:38:00.000-07:00

This is where we'll put the 10 foot driving gate next weekend

2005-10-10T05:37:00.000-07:00

The two poles will eventually be spliced together

2005-10-10T05:36:00.000-07:00

Straight-as-an-arrow top line

2005-10-10T05:34:00.001-07:00

Attempt #1 at artsy-fartsy pics

2005-10-10T05:34:00.000-07:00

Attempt #2 at artsy-fartsy pics

2005-10-10T05:32:00.000-07:00

Ruger's newly gray eyebrow

Catching Up

2005-10-02T21:19:00.000-07:00

First of all, I'd just like to say thank you to the dream gods for blessing me with dreams of making out with Orlando Bloom all night last night...

And now that that's out of the way...

Here’s what’s happened since I got my pointless case of writer’s block:

- I devoured the new Harry Potter book and then spent 2 weeks waiting for someone… anyone… to finish it so I could discuss it with them. Then I read it again.

- We went sailing in the Apostle Islands with Turd Money, and Turd Monkey’s uncle. (Ha ha! Get it? He’s a Monkey’s Uncle!) What a great time. I swear I need to be careful or El Presidente will leave me for a sailboat. Anyway, I'll try and post pics in the next couple of days.

- Lisa and I went on our yearly girls-only camping trip up north, though we did bend the rules this year and took Ruger to protect us from the meany-head bears. I’m not sure he would have done us any good, but he sure did have a good time swimming in the big lake.

- We went to a wedding in Stillwater and a wedding reception in Algona, IA. Both were hugely fun and we were able to catch up with some old friends we haven’t seen in ages.

- Hurricanes Katrina and Rita hit the Gulf coasts of Mississippi, Louisiana, and Texas. There was unprecedented damage in New Orleans. It’s devastatingly sad on many levels, but on a purely selfish note, it upsets me that one of the places that was on my list of things to see is now basically unrecognizable. And now that I read that I realize how horrible that sounds since many thousands of people down there are still homeless, and no one yet knows what the total death count will be. I think thoughts like that are self-defense mechanisms. I spent a couple of weeks near the point of being physically sick every time I thought about what I would do if faced with the decision to leave everything behind, including my boys, in order to save myself. I finally just had to turn those feelings off completely and give money (what else can we do?) every time we had the chance.

- Lisa and I started our MBA program. Our first class is accounting, which is basically review as we just finished NINE FREAKING MONTHS OF ACCOUNTING!!! Actually, though, I’m glad it’s review. It’s a great way of getting back into the swing of going to class. It helps that my professor is very similar to Andy in both looks and mannerisms. I feel like I’ve known him for years, though it’s kind of hard not to pat him on his ass every time he passes me in class… Oh, wait… I didn’t just type that, did I?

I finally believe Mom when she says being in Arizona is like being in Hell.

2005-09-23T15:56:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning in a terrible panic. In my barely awake state I was sure I was back at the bottom of the Grand Canyon, and I was almost in tears at the thought of having to climb back out. I’ve been having half-a-wake dreams like this ever since I got back. I’m sure Andy thinks I’m being over-dramatic (Me? Over-dramatic? Never!), but I’m sure I’ll never forget the feeling of total helplessness and terror I had during the night we spent at the bottom of the canyon, in the hell-like heat, knowing I’d have to haul myself up and up and up. But, I’m getting ahead of myself…

Our trip started off with about 24 hours in Phoenix followed by a couple of days in Sedona, where I learned that if anything strange happens you can blame in on the Vortex. I’m going to skip over this part because, well, it’s pretty boring. We spent a lot of time with family, but that was about it. Besides, if I don’t hurry up and write about the canyon, I’ll loose my nerve. All you really need to know is that I didn’t sleep. At all. The entire time we were there. So that’s 2 nights without sleep, and be sure to keep a running total.

Wednesday, we drove through Flagstaff and up to a town about 2 miles from Grand Canyon Nation Park. We checked into the hotel and drove a block to the visitor’s center, which was built and maintained by National Geographic. We bought our park pass and watched a ½ hour IMAX on the canyon that was outstanding. We then hopped back in the car and drove the 8 miles to Mather Point, on the South Rim. The views were amazing (see pics below) and we were able to pick out part of our trail. At this point, it didn’t look that far down. What we didn’t realize at the time was that we were only looking at the bottom of the upper canyon. There was another 1500 foot drop through the lower canyon down to the river that we couldn’t see at all.

We found the spot where we would catch the shuttle the next morning to take us to the trailhead and then headed back into town. We ate at the Yippee-ey-oh restaurant (where the food and service was as terrible as the name) and then, after what seemed like days, went back to the hotel. At this point I was getting really nervous. And, after 2 days without sleeping, was nearing exhaustion. Which meant that I was REALLY cranky. I mean, big time. Not that it really matters, but I felt like confessing since I was pretty hard on everyone else.

We got back to the hotel and I finished packing a few things and then crashed on the bed. We had to get up at 4:15am so we could get most of our hiking done for the day in the cool morning, so I knew it was going to be a short night, but figured I’d be out the minute my head hit the pillow. That’s not quite what happened. About 15 minutes before the alarm was supposed to go off I was still wide awake, running through each and every possible bad thing that could happen and how I would handle it. In other words, night number 3 without sleep.

(My stomach is starting to churn… I need to get through this quickly…) After a quick trip to the shuttle stop and a short ride to our trailhead, we exchanged picture taking duties with another couple and took off down the South Kaibab trail. It was light out, but we had about 20 minutes before official sunrise.

Down and down we went. Our spirits were high and we laughed and chatted and took a million pictures. One of our biggest sources of amusement was the trail itself (which, further down, we would curse over and over again. I had originally thought that since the trails we were taking were 2 of the most popular in the park that they would be darn close to being paved. But, because they were used by mules hauling people and gear to the bottom and back several times a day, the mule’s hooves created 6 inch deep divots in the trail at about 2 foot intervals. So we were faced with either taking artificially altered strides in order to stop on the tops of each divot, or risking turned ankles by stepping in the bottom of the divots. And we really didn’t want to step in the bottoms because that’s where the mule poop was. Tons and tons of green, smelly, squishy mule poop everywhere we looked. At the end of the 2 days, we had been so overexposed to it that none of us even noticed it any more. But at this point, we didn’t care a bit. We felt good, it was nice and cool out, and the views were indescribable.

A couple of hours later, we took our first break. I had planned on breaks every ½ an hour, but we were going quickly and easily, so why stop? But what we didn’t realized was that each step put more and more stress on our backs and knees, and without those more frequent breaks we were causing some bad bruising to our muscles.

It was approaching 105 degrees by the time we reached the rim of the inner canyon and we began to realize the serious mistake we had made by pushing ourselves so quickly down the trail (and by having too-heavy packs). I had pulled a muscle in my right calf and was limping with every step. Andy and Jason weren’t doing much better. However, at this point, since it was getting so hot and we were way past the point of no return, we knew we needed to get to the bottom quickly. But about 15 minutes after we started down the inner canyon, I knew I couldn’t do it any more. Each step was excruciating. I was in tears, partly because of the pain and partly because I was so damn tired, but we could still barely see the river below. I knew we still had at least another hour left, but I couldn’t imagine taking one more step. This is when Jason, for the first but not the last time on the trip, came to my rescue and took my pack for me. That was the only thing that allowed me to make it. What should have been one of the best parts of the trip, crossing the Colorado via a large suspension bridge, exists as a fuzzy recollection of surprise that the bridge didn’t swing at all. I was on empty. Each step was torture. (My eyes are tearing up just thinking about it.) Then finally we arrived at our site. Afraid of sitting down and not getting back up, we set up our tent and what gear we could. But it was so hot. One of us wandered by a thermometer in the sun and noted it was pegged out at 140 degrees (it was 113 in the shade). Luckily, there was a cold stream running through our site that both kept us cool and helped our sore muscles. It only helped so much, though, and within an hour of reaching our site we were almost unable to walk. We couldn’t lift our feet and had to shuffle along like we needed walkers.

Our time at the bottom passed in a blur. I remember visiting a cantina and drinking lemonade. I remember part of a ranger talk on California Condors. At some point we must have made dinner over our stove and bought more food for the next day. And we definitely spent a lot of time in the water, which was the only thing that made the heat bearable. But I do remember this, though, clear as day. I didn’t sleep a wink. (Fourth night in a row.) It never got below 100 degrees, even in the middle of the night. And to save weight, we hadn’t brought sleeping pads. And we were planning on getting up at 3:00 am so I was nervous we would oversleep.

My vigilance paid off (despite the fact that I was almost hallucinating from exhaustion) and we were on the trial by 3:30. We started off shuffling around through the dark, but soon our muscles loosened up. Knowing the first 2 ½ miles were relatively flat, and that it would soon get very warm, we pushed hard. Before we knew it, we were out of the inner canyon. A mile or so later we hit Indian Garden, the half way point, and we had only been on the trial for 3 hours. Only 4 ½ miles to go, with water and shelter ever 1 ½ miles along the way. But the next 4 ½ miles were all steep switchbacks, and over 2 hours later we had only made it to the first shelter. I was in tears, yet again. All I wanted to do was see Mom, who I knew was waiting for me at the top.

Jason and Andy again saved me by taking my pack for the next mile and a half. Back and forth, up the switchbacks we went. Again, this section went by in a blur. But then, I spotted the shelter that was 1 ½ miles from the top. There were rangers there who told us exactly what to expect on the next leg, and who made sure we were cool and rested before they let us push on. There were also close to 100 people on the trial with us now, most of them day hikers who had come down to this point and were now heading back up. Because there were so many people, I took my pack back and let Jason push on ahead to the top. Andy and I got into a rhythm of stopping at every shade spot, which happened to be after every other switch back.

At about ½ a mile from the top, we ran into Jason, sans pack. He had made it up, found Mom and Dad nervously waiting for us at the trail head, dropped off his pack, and come back down to find us. He took my pack yet again and handed me a walkie talkie. Mom was on the other end promising me I was almost done and that she would have a diet coke waiting for me when I made it. She sounded almost as relieved to hear from me as I was to know how close we were. Then Jason pointed out the end of the trail and I realized I could actually make it. Before I knew it, I was in Mom’s arms. Later that day we tallied up how long it actually took us to come back up and realized we did the first 4 ½ miles in 3 hours, with the last 4 ½ miles taking us 6 hours. Also, I found out that the reason Mom was so nervous was that 2 people had died and one had been seriously injured during the two days we were in the canyon because of the heat.

The drive back home went amazingly fast, but then again, I was engrossed in the new Harry Potter book. The three of us were back to our shuffling, though, making Mom and Dad wince as they watched us try to walk. It took well over a week for Andy and I to get back to normal, and we still both have pains in our knees that weren’t there before. Jason and Andy say they would do it again, but with lighter packs, and in the spring. I, on the other hand, doubt I’ll ever try it again. I still get nauseous thinking about the experience, and will have nightmares about it for a very long time.

2005-08-24T16:50:00.000-07:00

South Kaibab

Grand Canyon - The short version

2005-07-24T22:22:00.000-07:00

I finally got around to posting Grand Canyon pics... I'll blog the trip here in a couple of days but wanted to get the best part up sooner. El Presidente took all of the pictures, and did such a great job that I had a heck of a time deciding which ones to post. If you want to see more, let me know... I have everything he took with the digital camera on cd in my office.

As you'll notice, most of the pictures are from on the way down. As we were going up we were concentrating more on just making it to the top than taking pictures...

2005-07-24T20:16:00.000-07:00

Get your kicks...

2005-07-24T20:15:00.000-07:00

My family

2005-07-24T20:14:00.000-07:00

Devil's Bridge - Sedona, AZ

2005-07-24T20:13:00.000-07:00

A little scrambling

2005-07-24T20:12:00.000-07:00

Devil's Bridge (And Keith's Legs)

2005-07-24T20:11:00.000-07:00

Mather Point - The night before the hike

2005-07-24T20:10:00.000-07:00

Smoke from forest fires on the north rim

2005-07-24T20:08:00.000-07:00

Mather Point

2005-07-24T20:07:00.000-07:00

Away we go...

2005-07-24T20:06:00.000-07:00

Cedar Ridge - 1 1/2 miles from the top

2005-07-24T20:05:00.000-07:00

The view from Cedar Ridge

2005-07-24T20:04:00.000-07:00

Looking up to where we started

2005-07-24T20:03:00.000-07:00

Look closely and you can see some South Kaibab switchbacks

2005-07-24T20:01:00.000-07:00

Mule poo... Our constant companion...

2005-07-24T20:00:00.000-07:00

Starting into the inner canyon

2005-07-24T19:59:00.000-07:00

The Black Suspension Bridge

2005-07-24T19:58:00.000-07:00

Crossing the Colorado River on the Black Bridge.

2005-07-24T19:57:00.000-07:00

Bright Angel Trail - Almost to the top

2005-07-24T19:56:00.000-07:00

5000 feet above where we started

2005-07-24T19:54:00.000-07:00

We had to carry him the rest of the way out... Or not.

2005-07-24T15:36:00.000-07:00

Safe and sound at the top

Technical Difficulties, Part II

2005-07-09T09:07:00.000-07:00

So Chris and I have figured out why my pictures aren't showing up... Our work's firewall is blocking them for some reason. If you click on the pictures, you get the "This site is unappropriate" Blue-Screen-Of-Death. They still work from home, though. And I'm posting a test picture with this blog in a different format to see if that works...

Anyway, I hope you all have a safe and wonderful week while I'm in Arizona.

Alf - May Mason let you sleep.
Chris - Keep an eye out for my twin that comes into CPOR.
Matt - I know it's going to be tough getting used to civilization again, but hang in there.
Lisa - My heart and prayers (to spirits, God, the Space Brothers, and anyone else who's listening) are with you. If you need anything, please don't hesitate to call.
BBot - I promise I won't do anything the Crystal Kid wouldn't do.
Tera - I hope your reunion was great (that was last week, right??).

Love you all and see you in a week.

Some Fucking Muscle

2005-06-30T22:16:00.000-07:00

I forgot about this until just now...

The head of Augsburg's MBA program lead the informational session Lisa and I went to last week. He's an old Eastern Eurpoean guy with gray hair and the most interesting accent. The session was very good, but my favorite part, by far, was when he said the following:

"These college kids nowadays... I get older and they just stay the same age."

Yes. They. Do.

Technical Difficulties

2005-06-30T21:50:00.000-07:00

Sorry for all of the problems with the picutres and links from yesterday. They all work on my computer here at home now so if you're still having problems at work please let me know. Not that I can do much about it.

We started packing for our Grand Canyon trip tonight... I have no idea how we're going to manage to haul everything that we need. Thank goodness Jason's pack is huge. I think he's going to get the raw end of the deal, but that's what he gets for letting us plan the whole trip.

And the highlight of my evening? I got to hold Mason for 20 minutes or so. All of those genes that women are born with... the mommy genes... all started expressing at once. My biological clock was ticking so loudly I didn't hear a single word anyone said to me for the first several minutes I was holding him. Finally, something made it through the tick-ticking: Mason's shrieking wail. Wow can that boy cry. And the second that sweet little banshee scream made it from my ears down to those mommy genes they immediately turned off. But then when he'd quiet down and look up at me with those gorgeous blue eyes, I'd melt all over again. I knew it was going to be hard to keep up my anti-kid mood once I laid my eyes on Heidi and Alf's baby. All I can say is thank goodness for his loud, beautiful, high-pitched, um, singing voice.

2005-06-30T18:59:00.000-07:00

A very pissed off Remy

2005-06-29T18:39:00.000-07:00

Ruger's new favorite passtime

Happy Birth Day, Mason!

2005-06-28T21:18:00.000-07:00

I finally have a really good reason to write. My friend Alfred's son, Mason William was born yesterday, June 27, 2005, at 2:15pm. He weighed 8lbs 9oz and was 21 inches long. I got to meet him today and though he was fussy, he was still a perfect little angel. He looks just like his dad, poor thing… I’ll post pictures as soon as I get some good ones (hint, hint, Alfred).

Here’s the present BBot and I brought them when we visited today.

We have Dora and Abby for the night while their mom and dad are at the hospital, so instead of our usual 130 pounds of dog in the house, we have 300 pounds. As Brad’s dad would say if he were here, we’re living with four deer. But all four of them are being great, due mostly to the fact that we played outside for 4 ½ hours straight. Dora, in particular, is being extra snuggly. Luckily, I’m used to Remy laying all over me, so really the only difference is the blonde hair. Andy, however, is having trouble telling the girls apart. So instead of getting the wrong name, he's calling both of them Abbydora. I'm sure they're very confused. Dora just took a big old sip of his good beer right out of his glass, though, so he has my permission to call them Big Shits if he wants to. Don't worry, Alf and Heidi. We're really not trying to get your dogs drunk.

In completely unrelated news, I think Lisa and I have finally found the perfect MBA program. It’s through Augsburg, and it’s only 20 months long. We’re planning on starting in September, which seems like a long time away until I remember it’s almost July and so it’s really only 2 months. I’ve got a lot to get done in 2 months… Luckily we’re on the home stretch with our accounting class. Speaking of which, I got a B+ on the midterm. I’ve never deserved a B+ less. If this wasn’t an Independent Distance Learning class, anyone who saw my test would accuse me of sleeping with the instructor for my grade.

2005-06-28T18:56:00.000-07:00

140 lbs of dog

2005-06-28T18:55:00.000-07:00

Dora and I bonding

2005-06-28T18:54:00.000-07:00

Abby

2005-06-28T18:53:00.000-07:00

Little King

2005-06-28T18:52:00.000-07:00

After a Storm

2005-06-28T18:51:00.000-07:00

Fire in the Sky

2005-06-28T18:49:00.000-07:00

BBot fishing in BWCA

2005-06-28T18:30:00.000-07:00

Really, I'm not bored.

2005-06-03T22:06:00.000-07:00

Best. Dog toy. Ever.

2005-06-03T22:05:00.000-07:00

Remy getting bubbles.

2005-06-03T22:04:00.000-07:00

Self-blowing bubble machine: The lazy woman's way of wearing out her dog.

How Can Accounting be Harder than Organic Chemistry?

2005-06-02T16:05:00.000-07:00

I promised Lisa I wouldn't talk about this any more, but, for posterity's sake, I need to record how badly that stupid accounting midterm sucked. And I won't bring it up again. Until, that is, I get my grade and then Andy has to talk me down from the roof because how in God's Almighty Name could a statistician FAIL A BEGINNING ACCOUNTING TEST!?!?!? AM I REALLY THAT FUCKING STUPID???

Okay... I feel better now.

The Email is Mighter Than the Sword

2005-06-02T00:29:00.000-07:00

Wanna know how to piss me off?

1) Open up a Jimmy Johns in the town where I live, but refuse to put mayonnaise on my sub if I ask for it, prompting this email exchange:

Dear Jimmy John,

I have been a loyal customer since my freshman year in college, almost 10 years ago. My "usual" has always been a Pepe, but we ALWAY ended our alcohol filled nights in college with 2 slim 2's with mayo and provolone.

Just a few days ago, a brand new Jimmy Johns opened up in the town where I live. Before this, the nearest JJ's was 70 miles away, so, needless to say, I was very excited. My husband and I made our inagural visit to this new JJ's this evening and, for old times sake, I decided to get a slim 2 with mayo and provolone. Much to my dismay, I was told that I couldn't get mayo on my slim 2. When I asked why, I was told it's a "Cardinal Rule of Jimmy John's." I just stared at the checkout person in disbelief... I'll admit that most of my slim 2's in the past were eatten in a druken state, but I'm 100% sure they ALL contained mayo. Besides, if I, as a customer, want mayo on my sandwich shouldn't I be allowed to have it? I'd even be willing to pay a little extra. But, sadly, I was denied my mayo and was pointed towards the mayo packets. What a dissapointment. I love Jimmy Johns, but unless this silly "cardinal" rule is changed, I may be forced to go to Erberts & Gerberts from now on, where they won't tell me what I can and cannot put on my sandwiches.

Thank you,
Kelly Carwash

Kelly,

I am glad that you love JJ so much. I want to take some time to explain our slim policy.

There are a couple of reasons why we limit slims to just meat and cheese. One is ease of operations. We have a menu of 17 sandwiches that all have specific items on them. We do allow customers to change stuff but are not a build your own type of sandwich shop. This takes too much time and increases the wait for all customers. As you know we are usually faster than anyone else in the sandwich business. It’s not that placing mayo that takes so long. It’s the time the customer takes to decide what they want that would slow down the line. We get requests to allow people to put just the item they want on slims and allow no other exceptions. The funny thing is that everyone has their own idea of what that item should be. Some think it should be lettuce, while others think it should be tomatoes. You believe that we should allow mayo. I am sure you can see the problem. We have to allow everything or nothing to keep the people happy. Everything would make us as slow as the other shop that resembles and underground train and rhymes with ubway.

Another reason is the cost and value of the slim. It is our value sandwich. If we allow people to add things to it then we are not getting the amount of money we need to be profitable. There is little margin in this business. Every penny counts. That is why you need to pay for the sub before you can add all the goodies you want to it. When you go to a burger joint they will allow you to add sauces and other items to their value item: such as the cheeseburger at the golden arches. The difference is that our slims have the same amount of meat, cheese and bread that our more expensive sandwiches do. When you get a cheese burger you get a smaller patty of meat, a smaller bun, and less fixings. You cannot turn a cheeseburger into a ¼ pounder with cheese. You can turn a slim one into a #1 by adding items to it.

We know people love mayo so we have packets available that save time and money.

I love that you care enough to let us know how you feel. We want your business and hope you keep coming back. I cannot speak for our competition and why they allow you to do what you would like us to do. The only thing I can say is that they know far better than I do what their product is worth.

Thank you for your time,

Bryan

2) Send me this article, knowing full well it would put me right up on my soap box, forcing me to send the folloiwng email to the author:

Dear Ms. Kersten,
I am interested in hearing your veiws on the growing number of married heterosexual couples who are choosing not to have children, or, more to the point, who are getting married knowing they will never have kids. I fail to see how these couples are any different from a homosexual couple, assuming your hypothesis that allowing homosexual couples to marry undermines the purpose of the institution of marriage: to have and raise children. Though I agree that when marriage was first introduced it was, at its core, about encouraging 2 parents to stay together to raise a family, I believe that our views need to evolve as our society evolves. A quick look around the world of heterosexual marriage shows me that the old reasons of encouraging marriage do not apply today. The number of parents I see who are staying together "because of the children" despite the fact that their behavior towards each other will almost certainly scar their child much more than divorce suggests to me that our ideas about marriage SHOULD change. Growing up, my parents always showed me that a happy couple makes a well-rounded and loved child. I have become a successful adult and am also in a very loving, committed marriage. I seriously doubt whether I would have turned out any differently if my parents consisted of 2 women or 2 men who loved each other as much as my heterosexual parents did. I believe that putting the emphasis of marriage on love, kindness, and understanding will do more for our children than putting the emphasis on the gender of the people involved.

Thank you for your time and for your thought provoking article. I honestly enjoyed reading the "other side" of this very heated arguement.

Sincerely,
Kelly Carwash

The Land of Swimming Pools and Cowboys

2005-06-01T21:48:00.000-07:00

I finally found a few minutes to write… At the rate I’m going, I’ll be lucky to post something once a month. Oh well. I’ll try not to let this die, but instead just post when I can. I probably shouldn’t even be writing now as I’m supposed to take my accounting midterm tomorrow, but if I have to look at one more way to compute the cost of good sold, or spend one more second trying to tell the difference between the retail method and the gross margin method, I swear I’m going to scream. One of these days I’m going to give up and write “No one does the crap by hand anymore!!!!!!!” on a sheet of paper and just turn that in for my assignment. I knew one of the dangers of going back to school after working for several years was that I wouldn’t have the patience for all of the things I’d have to do that I know won’t make a darn bit of difference in real life. So it’s not like I didn’t see this time wasting bull shit coming a mile away.

Many, many things have happened since I last wrote. My life is boring no more. Grandma Kelly, the dog whom this blog is named after, turned 17 years old (see pics below). Sally, the wonderful woman who owns Kelly and who’s responsible for the breedings that produced the dudes, had a birthday party for her complete with games, cake (chicken liver for dogs, chocolate for humans), and professional group portraits (picture #7 is of Ruger). The party should have been hugely fun, but I was caught between crying and throwing up the entire 3 hours we were there. I swore Remy was going to go after another dog and we’d be forever banned from Sally’s house. I’m rarely that stressed out, and was pretty much Queen Bitch the entire time because of it. After everyone else left, we tried setting Remy up to go after another dog so we could correct him when he got aggressive. Sally tried 5 dogs and, after being yelled at by me all day, he didn’t take the bait with any of them. Not only that, but we freaked him out so much that he slept almost continuously for the next 2 days.

A week after Kelly’s party, I was leaving for a conference in Phoenix. About 2 days before I left, though, I noticed that the place for which I currently work had an opening for a similar position down there. (Sorry to those of you who are finding this out just now… I had a feeling things wouldn’t work out, so I didn’t really tell anyone.) I had applied for this same position a few years ago and was offered the job, but the circumstances just weren’t right. And, Andy had never been to Arizona. It’s such a different climate that at that time we didn’t feel comfortable agreeing to move down there without him seeing what it was like. This time around, I didn’t think it was fair to even apply for the job without Andy knowing what living down there would entail, so at the last minute I got him a ticket with frequent flier miles so he could be down there with Mom and me for a few days.

Unfortunately, we arrived at the very beginning of a big-time heat wave. They had record highs the whole time we were there. Every day temps got up to somewhere between 105 and 115 degrees, and didn’t cool down until well after midnight. It was actually quite comfortable in the shade, but I came back without a tan because it was too hot in the sun to even lay out.

During my classes my mom and my aunt drove Andy around so he got to see most of the town, even if it was just from the back seat of a car. And, to make a long story short, Andy didn’t get any “warm fuzzies” from Phoenix. Besides, for some reason I felt like it was way too big of a city this time. Needless to say, we decided I shouldn’t apply for the job.

It was definitely a fun trip, though. The highlight, for me anyway, was going to game 2 of the NBA Western Conference finals. The Suns played the Spurs, and it was a great game, coming down to the last shot. Phoenix lost (and didn’t play all that well, either) but the atmosphere was incredible. And I got to see the current league MVP (Steve Nash) and a former MVP (Tim Duncan) play. The game alone was worth the trip. I was disappointed that I didn’t see any celebs, though. I guess Eva Longoria was there, but I’m not even sure I’d recognize her if I did see her. Also, Brandy is supposedly dating one of the Suns, but she must have had another engagement as she wasn’t in her usual seat. Seeing the Red Panda Acrobat during the half time show will have to be enough of a celebrity sighting for me.

Anyway, I guess I'd better get back to credits, debits, and generally accepted accounting principles. (Until about 12 hours after I first posted this, that last bit said "commonly accepted general accounting pricinples". I'm so going to fail this class.) Wish me luck on my test tomorrow!

2005-06-01T18:42:00.000-07:00

Talliesen West: Frank Lloyd Wright's architecture school

2005-06-01T18:40:00.000-07:00

Andy at Talliensen West